What Pop Culture Dreams Are Made of

Ke$ha - Blow …the video. With James Van Der Beek, unicorns, rainbows, deadly lasertag, human taxidermy (remember: the album is called Cannibal), and autotune. 

Enjoy.

Reactions upon watching this (in real time from gchat)

Marley: obv i have to watch this

WAIT THIS IS NOT ABOUT DRUGS?!

This is getting filed with the movie Blow in a category I am calling “WAIT THIS IS NOT ABOUT DRUGS?!”

Russ: no it is not about drugs but it has unicorns

Marley: fair enough

dude laser tag is AWESOME

also

this video kinda wins

Russ: i told you



updated to add: I just realized that this was the inspiration for the video. Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper plus some 8th grade doodles.  Ke$ha's what, 21 and a day? She still has those.

 

 ...wait, the movie Blow is totally about drugs, isn't it. huh.

autotune: how ke$ha will save us from ourselves

If you don't love Autotune with all your heart, I will fight you.

So-called music critics, hipsters and professional pop haters spend a lot of time and energy looking down their noses and tugging their trendy beards, aghast at how Autotune is used as a "cheap crutch" when an artist "can't sing." A few of these haters may have cut their teeth on Cher, and sneered a lot at T-Pain, but really began to warble when Kanye dropped 808s and Heartbreak, an outrageously solid album inexecusably missing from Pitchfork's Top 200 Albums of the 2000s. 

Indie darling Nick from the Islands tweeted that "non-stylistic use of Autotune was ruining music, and also I can't remember the words to my own songs, and have you any cocaine for me, dear sir?" (Maybe I'm paraphrasing a bit.) 808s was the most appropriate use of Autotune to date: Kanye West suffers for all of us, chief among his outrageous arrows the pain of losing his humanity. (Spike Jonze famously showed us a video of Kanye surgically removing his soul.)

The way I see it, the arguments against Autotune have nothing to do with style.

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Keshadollarsign: Just Being Miley

Oh, god, please Ke$ha, please, never stop speaking.

"Haters just like to hate."

"Cynics should...just...go be cynical."

 "It's not metaphorical."

No, Keshadollarsign, no it isn't.  You are 100% right. How many fingers am I holding up? No...actually, sure, sure, that's fine.

(Also, let's take a moment to note that her, um, "lazers" from the SNL performance were a bad rip-off of a Little Boots trick...or, you know what? Nah. Let the girl have her fun.

Keshadollarsign: once more into the bleach

In our continuing commitment to bring you everything that Keshadollarsign touches (it all turns to meth), the 'net leak of her new single with 30OHTHREE or whatever the fuck they're called.

Being perfectly honest, this is what I imagine an underage Chiptunes party held in a Tasti D-Lite would sound like. Although I think said party would conjure less imagery of sodomized Care BearsI dunno, I want to like this, because Keshadollarsign is battling off dude's come-ons like she was the Jennifer Garner of the food-court-wooing set, but it just leaves my head hurting like I drank a gallon of spiked Mountain Dew. 

The Continuing Story Of Keshadollarsign

Hey, remember Keshadollarsign, the trailer park checkout vixen known to the pop music world at large as Ke$ha? They propped her up long enough to do her best PTL anthem, "TiK ToK", on SNL.

Pop stars without much genuine talent (i.e. not Gaga, not Madge) forced to suddenly entertain a nation always amuse me with the lengths they'll go to for "show". In this case, note that fact that Keshadollarsign obviously constructed her outfit from shit Kid Rock's gut would no longer fit into after his last tour.

Also: raves. Also: Space. And space suits showing that she's an alien, we're all an alien, and it's a beautiful rain, beautiful rain.

 (fuck where have I heard that before...god, the Keshadollarsign, she's such the modern poet. Look out, Bernard Sumner)

Anyway and regardless, her fucking inflection still angers me--not her singing voice, no, but the way she actually says things. Listening to her say "clothes", "toes", etc, reminds me of how I feel when I think about my exgirlfriend, from Philly, saying "interesting": it's like nails down a fucking chalkboard of tiny little anthrax-filled bombs. I dunno, maybe she's that mealy-mouthed from her hygiene habits? Hey, kids, brushing your teeth with a bottle of jack every morning is...a bit excessive.

Keshadollarsign: WE WANT TO DO AN APARTMENT STORY WITH YOU. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING BUT SHOW UP PHYSICALLY. CALL US!